Hot McDonald’s french fries and a call home encouraged Salim Hamdan to cooperate under interrogation but Osama bin Laden’s driver did not like cold fries and isolation upset him, witnesses said at his Guantanamo war crimes trial on Friday.

“Mr. Hamdan commented that he liked McDonald’s fries and we brought fries in,” FBI special agent George Crouch told Hamdan’s terrorism war crimes trial before a U.S. military commission. “Mr. Hamdan even appreciated that McDonald’s fries are not good cold.”

This is perhaps the most trivial headline and introduction to an article about the Guantanamo war crimes tribunals I could possibly imagine. The later pages have more information about Hamdan’s interrogation and the ongoing trial, but that’s basically filler borrowed from other articles. Why on earth would an article about the availability and temperature of french fries make it to the “top news” feed of a national wire service?